From: Gary S. Gevisser []
Friday, June 06, 2003 5:35 PM
To: 'Devin Standard'
Cc: rest
Subject RE: Kapow



Devin, wonderful news everywhere unless of course you happen to be a member of the “Reign or Boy” [sic] households whose “head of households” Howell Rains and Gerald M. Boyd were summarily reigned in & “executed” their passing tho to be recorded as nothing more than “suicide” unless we can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they knowingly destroyed just one innocent person’s reputation in which case it would be wrong to label them anything other than “murderers” a basic tenet of Jewish Law.


At sum point these #1 and #2 top dogs responsible for what many ignoramuses around [the] world consider to be the epitome of “free speech” may be willing to go before a jury of their peers to make their case why they shouldn’t be “banned” i.e. never allowed to show their face in public again, to never be quoted in public to be watched nite and day so that they don’t have the slightest opportunity ever again to spill their filth including why Mr. Sulzberger, “whose family has controlled the Times for more than 100 years” shouldn’t also hang his head in shame for NOT applying “pressure” along with “the New York Times Co. board of directors to seek the resignations of his top too newsroom executives.”


I just got back from the beach with Pypeetoe who has finally settled down not being able to find a spot anywhere else in The Cave but on the “chez lounge” snuggled up so close that in order not to restrict his lung movement I have swung my legs which are now resting on the ducati’s saddle bags that have yet to be placed on what Jonathan refers to as the “crotch rocket”.


I no I may [be] repeating sum information I have mentioned before but I am in quite a hurry because I have approximately 8 emails that I would like to get out today that I will be working on simultaneously with this one including one to Diana Henriques of the New York Times. While eating breakfast at the American Café I picked up today’s San Diego Union Tribune where I read the article about this almost incredible situation happening on the east coast that will have reverberations around the world.


The old saying as goes California blah blah was getting a little passé, agree? The point about Mr. Sulzberger who I assume is Chairman of the Board not applying pressure is almost as outrageous as anything I have heard coming out of the mouth of any executive caught with someone else’s short hairs in their mouth, i.e. do you think they left enuf evidence from the lipstick these yoyoys wear when kissing each others butts for the Feds to collect DNA evidence to mention little of whether we will in fact get to the bottom of the severance packages that were negotiated in this rather slow exit.


The fact that the media are talking about how everyone was so surprised by these events should give anyone with just half the number of IQ points of both Poli Pollak and me combined, i.e. 100.5 enuf reasoning horsepower to know this dog don’t hunt. Who would have thought that my comments about Colin Powell’s son wittingly or unwittingly making a most brilliant decision earlier this week would have the folks at the top of the dung heap imploding.


Of course I am copying Valerie Schulte, King Golden Jnr et al of the Washington Bunch crowd along with others who make up a valid statistical sampling of the world’s population who are getting hungrier by the minute but who should get sum nourishment out of what folks like you and I have to say, healthy mind↔healthy body.


It is now going on 1:30 PM PST and while typing away here as quickly as a bat out of hell before my laptop overheats which I think is the main cause of all the problems I have been experiencing lately I am also trying to purchase too tickets online for tonite's showing of Pentecost at The Old Globe Theater. I was having sum difficulty following instructions but I now have confirmation


Confirmation Number:


Account Number:


Order Date:

Fri, Jun 6, 2003 at 1:44 pm


I have spent most of the past too days going back & forth mostly between this humble but very quiet abode and the beach doing little more than contemplating my navel while Pypeetoe has been toning his muscles ready to take on the world.


Today he was in full gallop for about 3 hours solid making mincemeat of the sand dunes created by the workers building tunnels and laying pipe all along the Del Mar cliffs next to the railway tracks to prevent the trains one day ending up in the oshon. I couldn’t help but shake my head as I listened very carefully to the explanations that made absolutely no sense altho my knowledge of physics is very basic.


Normally tho, folks who really know what they are really talking about are able to make me understand at least just a wee bit in terms of what principals are involved or at least be able to justify that the benefits exceed the costs which will unquestionably run into the millions probably 100 million before these guys put their blunted shovels away and move dirt around in another of the few remaining pristine spots here in southern California.


Once again the keys on my laptop are starting to stick which is frustrating the hell out of me and of course anything we can do to get the Devil out of each one of us is all good, so I will be forced to slow down 4 who would be happy with me Mr. Goodytooshoes all the time, agree? I will tho be using symbols and updated English


The Cave tho, is not tho quite as quiet as Stonehenge II. I simply cannot get over the fact that WWIII has finally got into hi gear, thank you G-d for sticking with us and continuing to inspire our great president and our very grand First Lady.


So why shouldn’t these yoyos along with that old bag Martha Stewart get arraigned for their misdeeds, spilling forth filth no different to the mullahs these past several hundred years and not just when the first issue of the New York Times hit the streets and the “Jew hating Jews” began hitting pay dirt?


The only thing one has to be careful with the news that D-Boys, i.e. the too top dogs of The New York Times simply “crashed”, yet tho, to feel the pain of those they have burned over the years is how someone like Rush Limbaugh, the so-called “conservative” talk show host will respond given the inkling of folks like your buddy Polie Pollak to start twisting things around, arguing that Limbaugh is, and has always been, a plant by the liberal establishment to undermine the integrity of those who believe in less government and more individual responsibility.


Hell if you cannot work out that Senator “loot” Lot and Senator “Weak-knaed

” Thurmond, the centennial Republican hadn’t mastered and executed this brilliant play that resulted in both a white and black person as spokespersons for the mostly inbred white color elitist establishment in the world then you are obviously in need for sum of my Bottoms Up Schooling [BUS], in the end tho, it is only the numbers that add up, math the only language ever so close to perfect.


The world is going topsy-turvy-curvy and I couldn’t be happier altho I was kinda surprised that you mite agree that the number 28 is a prime number altho you have had more than your usual distractions as of late but the same cannot be said of the vast majority of brain dead folk copied on that last email to Sammy Haim, a list that at sum point will eventually decrease along with the world’s population that will begin to diminish sooner than anyone has to yet to predict, of that there can be no doubt and thank G-d for setting this much needed trend in motion by picking away at the coast line to the chagrin of the California Coastal Commission who like Ho Chi Min Governor Davis are soon going to be taking it on the chin.


This heat buildup is really slowing me down but it gives me time to reflect on the fact that old Sammy boy has not once turned on the heat during the past 3 nights and it has been cooler lately than when he had it blasting away; could it be that my emails are finally getting thru to him that “Enuf is Enuf”?


There is fun in the air everywhere one just has to look around to mention little of whether Poli Pollak might decide on a name change once he sees how closely it is tied in with the “Poligraph” [sic] which seems to have shut up Sammy.


There is always the possibility that Sammy didn’t read my last email to him and of course there is also the possibility that he has chosen to independently go out and see how well he does on the Poligraph before taking me up on my challenge. You understand there is quite a bit at stake going on here at house known around town as The Tree House.


I would say that the owners of this house could get 5X as much rent muni as they get from both Sammy and I especially when you consider that during horse racing season they could likely get $5K per week possibly more and right now we are both paying I believe less than $2,500 combined. Even if the landlord were to double our rent it still would constitute a bargain to the average Joe Blow since this is the hottest little spot to capture more than your average size barracuda, mermaids to boot.


Given time constraints and the keys which are sticking more than ever I will leave any further thoughts for another time. I am listening to a CD that is a hodge podge of artists, the one artist who I think is dead and had a very bad hair do but a rather good voice just sang the words,


 I once shot a man in Reno just to watch him die…baby slow down...I keep my eyes wide open all the time…because your mine. I find it very easy to be true…I admit I am a fool for you…I walk the line…lite…I keep you on my mind day N nite…because your’e mine I walk the line…You’ve got a way to keep me on your side…for you I will try and turn the tide…close watch…because I walk the line.”


Top dogs everywhere are taking the plunge being forced to shove their poison tipped arrows up where the sun don’t shine ripping thru their colons eventually piercing their lungs and sum mite argue that getting my dog neutered was the first step in turning over the apple cart, the race to the finish line now fully underway, space going at a premium at Nextraterrestrial, just a matter of time but with time slowing down as we all get into rocking and rolling, time for folks to stop and think smart.


It must be the breath of fresh air that is circling the world, a new dawn awakening, no doubt the diesel Mercedes now out of California helping somewhat. Just help me out with this “pink-eyed kids” segment.


I just took a quick nap and I am now in recovery stage; most importantly the keys on the laptop are now working perfectly; this traveling “back & forth” and I may still need to take the sleep out of my eyes.


It is now going on 3:15PM PST. Yesterday was a blow out, not even the surf was good. Marie tho and I remain very much in love, giving each other all the necessary space needed 4 a healthy relationship and why it pays to wait before plunging into marriage and of course you would agree kids raised in a dysfunctional home is more than simply playing genetic roulette.


I will be taking the time out over the next several days to line up my ducks of that you can be rest assured.


I am not absolutely certain the next email I will be sending out will be to respond to the email Diana Henriques of the New York sent me back on the 14th of last month. Not surprisingly Diana is considered in the top 100 media people in the United States who mite need a helping hand in this time of basic needs not being met no thanks to liberalism that now has sum folks in the Bush Administration wringing their hands as they pass tax cut legislation that will undoubtedly keep the likes of the New York Times in business despite their fall from grace. When will these yoyos realize that it pays to count one’s blessings but of course it is necessary that you no first how to add, love you, Dad.


It is quite a dance these yoyos on the far left have going with those on the far rite who think that they exist for no other reason than the pursuit of their own happiness. You will notice in my footnote to my buddy Jerry sum further thoughts on the subject of self-indulgence that perhaps rather than having children being the most self-indulgent act in this universe is tu think that the number of people at your funeral will be other than that determined by the wether to mention little of the biggest myth of modern day times is that those with an education know best simply because they learn to talk and somehow use that as a substitute for wisdom, cuming out of institutions like Yale, Harvard, Cambridge & Oxford different idiots than what they went in, but idiots nevertheless.


Let me also know when you hear next from Poli Pollak. Before I next communicate with South Africa’s Minister of Finance I want to be as certain as one human being can possibly be that your buddy isn’t in fact advising the democratically elected South African Government but brain dead nevertheless on muni matters which would possibly explain the deep slump Mr. Manuel is currently experiencing altho I doubt his former wife is talking to members of the media about what exactly caused their relationship to break up. I assume the Manuels are now divorced, a hi probability in this day and age where there are so few value added manuals, hence MMI, “When the dialogue becomes too monologues it is the beginning of the end” that will come with free updates.


The gentleman in the center of the photo in that “diaglogue” hyperlink is my uncle David Gevisser who was kind enuf to give me a letter of introduction to the top dog law firm located on Bush Street in San Francisco when I first came to this country back in 1978. David is seated between my folks on the right and my father’s sister and her husband Leizer Molk on the left who has got even better looking with age.


Never ever to forget Martha Stew-art and Christopher Byron playing footsie-footsie in a restaurant during the Summer-Autumn of 1999 while I was going to the trouble of calling Christopher on my dime, a dime I have yet to be reimbursed by the attorneys who prosecuted the case against Ms. Stew’s co-director of Revlon, Ronald “The Finagle King” Perelman. It doesn’t always pay to be quiet, agree Christopher?


A picture tells a thousands words and you may recall me mentioning that David Gevisser has the worst stutter I have ever encountered altho it is possible that his son, Mark Gevisser, a renowned gay activist soon hopefully finding the time to get with the program and finish the autobiography of Thabo Mbeki, South Africa’s overqualified President, could surpass his father’s endless hiccup, possibly even kick the bucket when I lay out all my cards on the table, showing him and the world my strategic resources for engaging in “arm-to-arm combat” without so much as using the word butt, nothing tho shuts folks who have very little to say than smacking them square in the face with success in the marketplace.


As I and/oar my heirs go about making lite, hay and dough out of the twist,


 a whole lot of shaking going on…dominoes. Who have you been loving since I have been gone. Whose been playing around with moustache.


it is my sincere hope that Mark Gevisser will eventually take a deep breath, then rest up a while be4 visiting with his Dad providing David Gevisser who was more of a Moshal than he was a Gevisser with the facts of life that just because you can impress a prick like Charles Engelhard, hooked on coca cola, fixing the platinum market, and dying the richest man on the planet while kowtowing to the likes of Sol Moshal the crooked accountant who got screwed so royally in the end by none other than yours truly, doesn’t give you the right to speak out calling me of all people “naïve” even if you were drunk at the time.


I know that last sentence is quite a mouthful but I started to get in [tu] the CD that is on a “continuous play” mode. I think the singer is Roy Overland?


With time running out I simply don’t have the time to expand it and besides I wrote it mainly for brain dead South Africans who possibly wouldn’t make head or tail of it even if I had someone as eloquent as yourself, edit. When you spend so much time in a spot like South Africa with its casino mentality it is really hard to expect anything more than getting folks to lift the toilet seat, let alone need someone alongside you to check that you don’t pee on the bathroom floor.


The “Leizer Molk” photo was taken recently over at Stonehenge II and altho it wasn’t snowing it was nevertheless cold. I can’t recall how many J&Bs my father who is on the left drank before that photo was taken since the meal was only just starting but if you look very carefully at the too bottles of wine one was not yet opened but trust me the other was empty and it is rare that you will find a half empty bottle of wine in the refrigerator at the cabin since when we are not around there are a number of reptiles as well as mammals who keep guard and there are no warning signs on the refrigerator door to avoid “flying & driving” while scaring the living daylites out of would be intruders.


I think given the number of photos I have scanned into my website directory that show a number of WWII fighter-planes having seen better days it is only appropriate that I let you know that there is no evidence to speak of that my father “pranged” any neither during training nor in any of his 71 missions over rather hostile territory and nor should I add is there any evidence that my father was part of any Jewish conspiracy during WWII that had the folks responsible for planning and executing Israel’s War of Independence with the decks firmly stacked against our Jewish brothers and sisters, relying on damaged planes to mention little of the importance of spare parts needed for a cum from behind victory that simply blew the British away to mention little of the aggressors whose offspring will in time be properly schooled. Truth is in the air.


I just got a call from someone interested in the black Mercedes once owned by Sammy’s nephew and when he asked me who pays for the penalties for my not having registered the car in my name, the answer obviously didn’t sit well with him and he abruptly hung up. The call lasted all of 3 minutes and 7 seconds sum 300 words and the time showed 3:49 PM PST. I think people are getting the message that I can be bright, i.e. colorful, rather precise and very much Jewish.


Which brings me back to your weatherman buddy who shoots off his mouth so hafhas-idly altho I don’t think Poli Pollak is ultra-orthodox Jewish? For sum reason tho, Poli, the epitome of the self-righteous left, copied me on his response to you, “must be in the jeans!!!” [siC]but still hasn’t responded to my “Poll” email to him back on April 16th to mention little of him not following thru in calling to let me know when it is convenient for he and I and of course I think you should cum along for the ride, to appear on any one of the Network shows.


By the way the “id” hyperlink shows a photo of my mentor Amos Wright in the southern gentleman look, but if you look closely at his eyes you will see why you wouldn’t want to be in the trenches with anyone else, a Marine and Navy Officer battle tested in War on the hi-seas as well in the art of maintaining peace on land, never, never, surround yourself with “Yes men, they will kill you.” Both the beard and the moustache are apparently real.


I couldn’t help but collapse in laughter altho there were no visible signs other than perhaps lifting my eyebrows making bigger trenches in my forehead when I read sumthing the other day opposing the recent decision by Colin Powell’s son to allow more gobbling up by the already over rapacious media giants suggesting such actions would have a negative effect on the quality of shows shoved “hand & fist” into the households of the “populust” [sic], and yes it all cums down to trust and of course no one can rely on the Social Security Trust, #2 in terms of oxymorons.


Again, this was in fact an ingenious decision that will ultimately destroy the National Association of Broadcasters a lobbyist group for the brain dead such as Ted Turner altho they mite argue Cable and TV are distinct and different and actually compete, much like steak and lobster, i.e. when you are dead, you are dead and just because your heart is pumping and you can still pee with a “de-kath-eter” hanging from your penis or worse yet feel the need to give a speech when all the women want is to have sex with you doesn’t mean you can think which is the message I want to get across to our kids, so please help me fine tune the pitch.[1]


I would even agree to Larry King Live unless of course Larry is long dead; just remember it is just a matter of time before the Poli Pollaks of the world, King Golden Esq, et tu Brute, contend that Larry King has been from the very start nothing more than a rightwing “plant” to broadcast to the world the utter stupidity of the liberal bent, as in, “Let me show you how?”


My plan is to upstage Hilary Clinton, at least to sum degree, when she appears on the “Bawa” [sic] Walters ABC Special on June 10th which coincides with the 4th anniversary of my “going public” for the first time in taking on Ronald “The Finagle King” Perelman of Revlon Corporation, never will I forget altho I will forgive Mr. Krinsk for making fun of my rather pathetic, yet formal education.


I did meet on Wednesday for an extended lunch with “Jrk” and I must tell you the chicken-pot-pie was out of this world, but I just couldn’t help noticing all the other yoyos seated at Rainwaters that is a very fine restaurant even for the likes of Richard Rainwater altho I don’t remember Bass on the menu and you no there really wasn’t anytime 4 us to kid around.


Once again tho, I beat Jeffrey by sum too minutes getting there on the Ducati even after dropping the bike right at the start & consequently I didn’t feel in the least bit bad about him picking up the tab and in fact I don’t recall even thanking him for the ++++.


As I have said be4 the Ducati is very unforgiving and it pays to warm it up. My ankle is still hurting.


More importantly than a banged up knee, calf muscle still aching from the last time I played “touch rugby” is that everything is firing rite with this incredibly atypical writey friend and of course I know to look to my rite as well as those on the far left, the Poli Pollsters of the world soon possibly having enuf time to eject, then confining them to a small enuf space to enjoy their own mess, how about a closed-in pigeon staging pen without of course a pot to pee in since they so much like the smell not only of their own farts but more so it seems the incredible rot that spews forth out of their mouths that pollutes the skies even in a fukukta place like mile high stadium, agree?


I also realize that being within my “rights & privileges” brings with it the risk that others will seek other means to stop me as I set the chew chew train into hi-motion, tuf, as “tuf love” is all I can say to those who dare; better for them to dream about ways to join in and enjoy the rest of this incredible journey that is only now beginning.


I could just see Poli and Dr. Stew together in one pot, Dr. Stewart, the right of right, “Let me show you how” farting his nonsense, barely capable of speaking, while the left of left Poli “Pollster” [sic] with all his education chokes on his own vomit which Dr. Stew then laps up that increases his farting, the hot air flowing until such time that we now have a perpetual motion machine that could allow us to leave more oil in the ground that keeps space ship earth on track moving comfortably at light speed thru the universe quite noticeably different to the speed of lite within a non-vacuum environment, just ask someone who is punch drunk, i.e. anyone of my foes, and of course speed kills, the same with friendly-fire an unfortunate, fortunate, cost of doing business #1 and less of business #2, all a matter of perspective.


Do you think between me, you and the beast we can fill up a stadium up in your neck of the woods advising everyone to first evacuate their bowls much like what the SMARTER fighter-bomber pilots of the WWII did before going on a mission. What do u think that man with the hat bending over is smelling 4 or do u think he rigged the plane and is now wanting to destroy the evidence?


And why the Digital Age will not allow anyone to “duck & dive” each and every one of our moves soon to be recorded and for those of us who recognize that G-d watches each of us moves right from the start forcing us even when making love to be better each time the earth moves it is all 2nd Nature.


And those of us of course who are fortunate or unfortunate to have so much time on our hands there are +s & -s, remembering if you are with a woman who can count each time around you have to get better otherweiss catchung” [sic].


I seem to remember there was this football team that was called I think the Denver Crush, the defense anyway? I am now on full offense and I doubt there is going to be time tu take to many prisoners. I also seem to recall someone mentioning that the New Testament talks about 154 spaces set aside next to G-d altho it could easily have been the number 172 and since both add up to I0 who really cares? So, how many do you know to be left? Either way soon we will all be IWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwI


Thank G-d is all I can say for Mr. Pollak senior for having committed himself to raising a “pig-me” [sic]?


I am slowly cutting back on the coffee but did have 1 & ½ cups with breakfast over at the American Café that is owned by a man married to a South African woman who deserve a helping hand and besides their coffee and food are excellent but the wife is related to one of the Epi characters who had hoped I had by now jumped off on to Mars.


We do have to get together sumtime in August when Mars will be at its closest in sum 75 thousand years altho I am told that unless one is using a powerful telescope it doesn’t get any closer. It would be really nice if we could reintroduce the Gevisser brand of Gipsy Coffee and have you aboard a space rocket thumbing your nose at the fukukta NASA intellectual midgets saying, “And you thought pigs don’t fly” as you head off to Mars with of course Jeffrey Krinsk alongside.


Another reason the too of you haven’t yet met, this way you will get to no one another without being distracted by incredibly beautiful waitresses who of course don’t compare to any of our wives, so Campbell Soup just relax. Best of all you won’t have to deal with Jeffrey daring tu question your formal education.


It became rather obvious early in our lunch conversation that Mr. Krinsk has yet to read much if any of my emails, looking at me kinda sideways when I told him that I had in fact attended university, that there exists somewhere a copy of sum fukukta certificate that my father sent me sum 25 years ago that has yet to be opened, certainly I haven’t looked at the scroll that contains I am pretty sure a B.COM Degree which stands for Bachelor going back to the year dot, God not to moc.


Not that long ago Jeffrey wanted to know “Who is Gremeltech?” which sumtimes appears in the “Cc” line and I assumed that at least Jeffrey read the response to my dad congratulating Marie+I on getting married.


I wouldn’t be in the least bit surprised if Jeffrey has already emailed my father without copying me just to see whether my dad still claims to be related to me, possibly tho, just wanting to make certain I am who I say I am.


Perhaps Jeffrey questioning my credentials is compounded by my telling him that no one else from my immediate family other than my niece in Australia has called to congratulate us on our wedding to mention little of Jeffrey now going to possibly read the court documents relating our incredible victory in Judge Hendrix’s courtroom back on October 24th altho you were there as a witness but again the problem here is that Jeffrey has yet to meet you, and of course I haven’t had the time to pick up the phone or send an individualized email announcing our matrimony, until death do us part.


It so happens that I cannot recall a single family member commenting on that miraculous “come from behind” victory butT my family are pretty on the ball and probably read not only Dr. John Ben Stewart’s first outrageous declaration signed “under penalty of perjury” where he obviously confused me with someone else but they may also have taken the time out tu read his second declaration also signed “under penalty of perjury” in which he goes on for sum 7 pages about unadulterated nonsense and of course time doesn’t permit right now for me to discuss Ms. Kathryn Murray’s pitiful declaration but the one comment my mom would have just love reading were the too sentences side by side beginning on line 22 of page 2 which declares in black print on white paper,


“When this occurred, Marie placed all of Mr. Gevisser’s belongings outside her house for him to pick up. At that time, Mr. Gevisser threatened Marie, with the insistence that she owed him a large sum of money.”


First, my mother as well as every member of my family will attest to the fact that I never once picked up in the 1091 weeks I was a resident of South Africa for the simple reason it was my parents’ decision to have children. My mother will attest to the fact that G-d kept questioning her whether she was really prepared to put up with me and after 8 miscarriages he apparently was convinced.


Both parents were also smart enuf to have worked out their differences before I arrived on the scene including setting aside monies each and every month to afford help around the house in the event they got into a scuffle.


Furthermore when you see your parents always behaving respectfully toward one another, never allowing politicking to enter the mind of certainly their youngest it is unlikely there will be all that much to pick up and besides simply buying stuff for kids to win over their love went out in the Dark Ages.


Nothing tho like have rather enlightened folk to take care of you despite them both having spent so many years in a deprived society. And G-d help anyone who dares to declare that “us English” are a bunch of drunks, funny accents, yes. Now to be clear on this matter of “fisty cuffs” between my parents.


I have no idea what went on their bedroom but not once do I recall either my father or mother exiting with either blood streaming down their faces or any bruising and remember my mother has skin very similar to Marie who has now warned me repeatedly not to load up any pictures of her naked seeing nothing wrong tho in my loading up sum of the stuff I have been collecting from Penthouse Magazines over the past several months.


And of course at sum point I plan to communicate with Kathy Keeton the vice chairman who I still seem to recall was once a stripper at the Butterworth Hotel in Durban or perhaps it is just the Butt” as in who is “buttering her bread” these days making everything she did getting to the top dog position worth all the aggravation she might possibly endure from me in the future.


In all likelihood Ms. Keaton is my kind of gal and woe to Dr. Stew or his equally deprived attorney who once tried to make hay out this hyperlink, the sick folk they are. I bet you my bottom dollar you will never see either Dr. Stew or Mr. George G. Hurst smiling in my company, naturally that is, without them bending over big time to make amends for their outrageous behavior that makes anything in any porn magazine pale in comparison.


Nor for that matter do I recall my mother once lifting a finger let alone a hand to my father and to my father’s credit the only time I saw or heard anything smashing was when a cigarette ashtray that I happen to have in my possession went flying across the room and perhaps it was simply my father warning my mother that in the event she didn’t quit smoking their youngest son would somehow find the very best class action litigator to fix her chain smoking habit “once and for all”.


It would have been one thing for my dad to help around the garden but it would been a bit much to expect my dad to don a French maid’s outfit. The point being that Dr. Stew has shown time and again how incredibly unfit he is in every single category under the sun and of course during discovery I will unearth every complaint ever filed against Sharp Memorial Hospital, their Medical Director having “by-ten off” [sic] far more than he can possibly chew, no poison pill provision, at least not on my watch.


Perhaps why Dr.Stew just took a week off tu try and get into sum resemblance of order, shape is sumthing this idiot doesn’t have a clue about to mention little of values and of course when it comes to chromo, the richness of the colors, the 3rd leg in the stool in getting a painting to cum alive, we have the most incredible evidence in the world showing him to be a bigot, none more compelling, however, than his second ex-wife, my treasure’s declaration signed “under penalty of perjury.”


I doubt that my parents who worked hard enuf and saved whenever they could tu afford a maid or too ever generated tho, the amount of cash Dr. Stew-art makes altho I haven’t seen any documentation that shows he cannot afford a maid, even once, every say 10 years which is how long he and his second ex-wife were married nor do I think he can produce receipts that he ever paid a maid in the 10 years they have now been divorced and nor for that matter do I recall Dr. Stew ever responding to Marie’s “pigsty” comment about the home where her kids spend sum 50% of the time but we can’t however, forgive or forget that “teeth” he sent her right before sending her the “principal” email he thought would have me go off the deep end and instead had me firing off the first round of my “principia”.


No longer am I gong to be using the last 3 letters of his last name for reasons that are obvious.


There was as you may know a scene involving Dr. Stew’s current girlfriend back in 1999 when Dawn was told by Dr. Stew that I had referred to her as his maid which was untrue.


At the Thanksgiving which was held at Marie’s house, I cannot remember if we had yet served the turkey, when Dawn proceeded to try and trap me right below the trap door in the garage leading up into the attic, clearly wanting tu take my head off and given her size when compared to me she could have just bent her neck, stretched just slightly forward, opened her massive mouth, which is about the only thing the same size of mine and lobbed off my head no doubt leaving my teeth behind for that would have made my mother oh so upset, Zena Gevisser breaking all the records, addressing stuff such as the Importance of Being a Woman and besides my mother got tremendous pride out of my 64 sets of teeth.


And you wouldn’t want to kick Zena Gevisser or her “nanny boy” anywhere near our mouths. I have had my shares of broken bones & bloody noses but never has anyone come close to knocking out my front teeth and were it not for my rugby skills of being able to “duck & dive” I would have been lucky to have come away with only my wisdom teeth remaining.


Make no mistake Dr. Stew didn’t only get every single one of my most important physical characteristics wrong when he pranced down to court to start this wretched ball rolling, never to forget Jonathan, a ten-year-old, more than a fukukta stepson to me, in tow, describing me much closer to Dawn who has had her share of court battles and perhaps much more which would no doubt all become part of the discovery process as things heat up to mention little of Dr. Stew using like any other bully someone else to shoot their poison tipped arrows.


Dr. Stew thought that by rambling on, too signatures signed “under penalty of perjury” no one would ever go back and take a look at the diatribe that even if u had got a monkey to throw darts at a keyboard u wouldn’t have been able to mess up as much as this lunatic did.


And the more I think about all this the more convinced I am that we should be very careful to compare animals who behave rather well even when going to the toilet than to the likes of men and women like Dr. Stew and his Kathryn Murray.


Both of them, by the way, like to dive, and never will I forget the time the too of them were hitting on each other on that very same spot where you are seated wearing that bloodied glove.


Not only did I never, not once, ever “pick up” any of my belongings outside of Marie’s house, if any were placed there, for according to Marie it could only have come about “by the hand of G-d” [sic] and I have yet to hear Marie ever use the word G-d other than when making fun of me calling Pypeetoe “god.”


So its possible then that the garbage man made out but then again I have never kept much of anything at Marie’s since we mostly hang out in the nude, just kidding, quite different to Dr. Stew who hoards and clearly feels at home living in a pigsty just one of the many reasons why Marie decided “Enuf is Enuf.


Finally on this one not altogether unrelated matter that has yet to be resolved; my mother is in fact sitting on most of my cash altho whenever I visited with her I would always say “What is mine is yours” altho what she may have heard was, “What is mined is yours” and thought that I was possibly threatening to blow up the entire village of Wivesliscombe where she lives with my step-father when not traveling to Israel to help with mine removal operations.


My English folks were great fans of “Princess Pi” [sic] who was like most people with to much time on their hands was barking up the wrong tree going after visible targets when most of the damage is done with the brainwashing that comes from poor parenting.


As an experienced babysitter she would have been far better off globe trotting educating giraffes not to step on mines since there is a good reason I believe sum of our military still use mines to defend our peace keepers who are not “bought & paid for” by the French.


And you were thinking I had possibly forgotten about the boys and girls who masterminded and executed with pinpoint accuracy the rigging of the California Gubernatorial elections held last November 8th.


And of course who is surprised that JBS has yet to congratulate his second ex-wife having made absolutely certain she wouldn’t repeat her one and only mistake in life, so Mr. Hurst Esq. why not take all this and smoke that in your big fat pipe.


Hey, I can spell when need be and again buster it is time for you to speak up loud and clear if you see any problem with any of the photos I still have hyperlinked and remember I am not giving you permission to enter my website PDF database directory. And one final point if in fact you are no longer in communication with your client Dr. John Ben Stewart [JBS] as he last protested to his second ex-wife then please let me know.


I am also using this email to communicate with my former attorney Mr. James C. Ashworth’s former assistant, Jodi Ruiz, that I will be sending over a messenger to her offices the first part of next week to pick up my files which happen to contain the originals of some headline comments Mr. Krinsk once wrote and of course he was thanking me in his rather profound way.


So Jodie, don’t sit on this email and remember u very likely will be called as a witness as I turn up the heat on JBS et al and of course Mr. Ashworth is in deep dudu. And while I am at it I will copy his niece, Gabriele Forsyth over at the Republican Party stronghold who along with the attorney for the NRCC continues to do our great President George W. Bush a great disservice.


Devin, sorry about that interlude which also had me taking another call on the Mercedes which lasted 25 seconds which came just 15 minutes after Marie called to let me no she is about to take a shower and “not to rush” but all the more reason to finish off. It is 5:21PM PST and now I am going to really speed things up.


I will have to delay the other emails including one tu my friend’s son whose name is Gabrielle, an attorney+chef looking for a possible ▲ of life.”


By the way, I think you really would do just great being a spokesperson for Gipsy Coffee and maybe by the time I am done with Polie he will agree as penance for all the nonsense noise he is responsible for now circulating within earth’s atmosphere ad-infinitum to do a commercial spot or too for Gipsy Tea which was also one of the family’s brands.


I really cannot ask much more of Mr. Krinsk 4 his has gone well beyond the call of duty also letting me know that there were other witnesses lined up who could have been helpful to nailing Ronald “O Ring” Perelman but for sum reason fearful of the “Capo Di Capi”. Can you imagine this pint sized, bald, deprived character whose only claim to fame is that he has stolen sum umpteen billion dollars having the balls to threaten folks who he simply co-opted to do his dirty work? I can’t wait to the next elevator ride I take with him.


Now bare in mind that I am still waiting for Dr. Juma to get back to me to schedule my getting fixed” and so I need to work on finding a spot to place my testosterone in safe keeping.


The more I think about some of the other emails I need to get out, perhaps I might get to one or too when I get back from the theater this evening assuming Pypeetoe wants to go for a trot on the beach since I am not allowed to use the computer at Marie’s house.


Do you think when I get around to responding to Diana Henriques of The New York Times by using hyperlinks to sum of my slogans to mention little of Marie’s “When the dialogue becomes too monologues it is the beginning of the end” this may serve to better protect our trademarks than relying on Wes Anson who has yet to get back to me so I can forward him and his associates with our GrubbyGrub and business plan?


I did tho, give it all to him on the phone in less time than it took for me to provide Jeffrey Krinsk with the entire “nuts & bolts” of what will be contained within Manager Minute One [MMI] including all the evidence I believe will be necessary to convince 99.989% of the population who can read and write that I have finally translated into English from math Einstein’s remarkable equation e=mc² which is proof positive of the existence of G-D-Nature and as you know RNA is just a hole bunch of messaging, Man-kind perhaps one day being removed from the number one spot in the list of oxymorons which reminds me I still need to update Part II of my Xmess 2002 gift to Danielle.






Ps-I started to run into hyperlink problems and since I have to be out of here, dinner before theater, perhaps Chez Loma, altho when I stopped by the house Marie had a mini dress laid out. Really hot. I must now run. No time to check. Tomorrow, hopefully, another day, otherwise just go at it!


 [word count 7994]


From: Devin Standard []
Sent: Wednesday, June 04, 2003 8:42 PM
To: Brian Stanton; 'Angie'; 'Arnoldo'; 'Ellen'; 'Hippy'; 'Mongo'; raymond' 'moulton; 'Nasty'; 'Po-Li'; 'Raymond'; 'Toombs';; TOM BAKALY; arpad;; Tony Bartosek; Andrew Battmer; BEAST; JB Behrins; Bettina;; Christopher Burke; Andrew Cozine;;; Tatiana & Dirk; Donal; donnyboy!
Cc: mt evans; Glen Farmer; Sam Fischer; gary; Gary & Geist; William Giorgini; Francis Stanton Jr. M.D.; David A Michael; Michael; Ted Miller; Mitch; Mitchell; Jacki Muir; Jacki & Paul Muir; Ringland Smith /Kristy P. Murray
Subject: Kapow!


5 year old Victoria Standard captured the giant 2nd place trophy in this weekend's Tae Kwon Do tourney and Alexander placed 5th. Alexander's match turned into a full contact event. He out placed 15  other 8 & 9 year olds. He was fortunate to be wearing both the mouth piece and the cup. Not as much blood as in last month's King of the Cage event!



Colorado is great!




Brian Stanton <> wrote:

bumped into your dad in NYC today - keep them damn pink-eyed kids away from other humans!



Brian Stanton, Business Development Consultant
KnowledgeBase Marketing
Holland Hill Road
Fairfield, CT 06824
P: 203-319-0268
C: 203-952-1119


From: Devin Standard []
Thursday, May 29, 2003 7:32 PM
To: Brian Stanton
Subject: Re: Dude!


1/2 hour from Boulder. Definitely let's do it. I had to move further away from skip and his golden pipe exercises!


Hey, I was surprised to hear you moved to
Colorado - back in your alma
mater's state, eh? Hope the job offer is a good deal. how far are you from
my sister-in-law in Boulder? i'm trying to get out there to visit her this
summer and will hook up with you if I go.
best o' luck in the new job/environs!

-----Original Message-----
From: Devin Standard []
Sent: Tuesday, May 27, 2003 8:17 PM
To: 'Arnoldo'; 'Po-Li'; JB Behrins; JB Behrins; brac; Adam Holloway;
kleinstein jake;; David A Michael; Bernadette
Schuller; Brian Stanton
Subject: NYC

Colorado is great!
I hope you are all well.
Charlotte and the kids are moving here June 1st, immediately after the kids
Tae Kwon Do tournament.
I shall be in NYC on June 2-4.
Cell # is 970 443 2769- but the Voice Mail is not working yet.
Office # is 970 669 3050 ext.2527

Brian Stanton, Business Development Consultant
KnowledgeBase Marketing
Holland Hill Road
Fairfield, CT 06824
P: 203-319-0268
C: 203-952-1119


[1] The “eter” in the “de-Kath-eter” hyperlinks will take you on a journey tu when things began to go wrong for Senator Kerry.  I happen to think this well hung Senator is probably the best the Democrats can cum up with assuming there isn’t a living sperm amongst the Republicans who isn’t “yacht & paid 4” [sic].


Page 12, line 16 of the deposition taken of a Revlon executive operating, in my opinion, under strict orders from Ronald O. Perelman who he refers to as the “Capo di capi” could pose sum problems for Mr. Krinsk down the road mostly tho, when he meets his maker. See for yourself and tell me what you think of Mr. Krinsk’s comment, “I am from the west coast” to mention little of his question in line 8, “It [the subpoena] did not upset you, I hope.”



          1       Q.  What was your reaction upon learning that


          2   you were going to -- that you were served with a


          3   subpoena and that you were going to appear here?


          4       A.  When the guy showed up at my door, I was


          5   surprised.


          6       Q.  The subpoena was personally handed to you?


          7       A.  Right.


          8       Q.  It did not upset you, I hope.


          9       A.  No.


         10       Q.  And where were you served?


         11       A.  My yard.


         12       Q.  Your...


         13       A.  Yard.


         14       Q.  On your yacht?


         15       A.  No, yard.


         16       Q.  Yard.  I'm sorry, yard, yacht.  I'm from the


         17   West Coast,


         18       A.  I haven't got my yacht yet, but I was in my


         19   yard.


         20       Q.  I understand.


         21               What did you next do?  And by that I


         22   don't mean finish mowing the lawn.  I meant with


         23   regard to --



Mr. Krinsk is in fact originally from the east coast, speaks English as well as say my step-father Alan Zulman who still has Klerksdope

-Afrikaans accent despite taking English courses with my mother going on sum 20 years altho running into other South African transplants makes it difficult to stay with the program when you have to revert back to dealing with those who have had their sequencing interfered with.

To be clear on this point about my step-father having smoked Durban Poison [DP] while at primary school, there is absolootly no evidence but even he would be hard pressed to concede that the “slaves” his company SAIC [sic] aka South African Clothing Industries employed didn’t at least fart sum of the pot they smoked in the company’s pristine facilities far superior to most sweat shops anywhere in the world, is as hard to believe as President “Wallpaper” Clinton arguing he never inhaled.

As far as I know the only interference Mr. Krinsk who was transplanted to the west coast soon after graduating from Boston College Law School has been dealing with the likes of my good, but disconnected friend, Laurie Black and the odd washed out attorney who squeezes whatever testosterone is left in his-her body, then starts using what little is left of their brain after those responsible for raising them were finished telling them, “Let me show you how” and wasting Mr. Krinsk’s precious time seeks guidance in terms of how to respond to my knuckleballs.

Mr. Krinsk tho, first flexed his muscles while heckling the likes of Ron Fox the President of Hang Ten International who was smart enuf to hire someone who chose not to go the path of the “Old Boy Network” and now makes yoyos from the likes of “Sadden Apes” eat their words, at times shoving gravel showing that he has evolved from his slave brothers who simply kicked up dust.

The net result is that his white-shoed goodytushoes counterpart attorneys are then forced to walk around with carrots up their asses while propagating nothing but sheer madness out of their mouths, the Dr. John Pollards tho of the world nothing short of blessings in disguise, a far cry from the other former Centaur Kerry who put his foot in his mouth, chewed off his toes and it is just a question of time be4 his health provider submits an insurance claim for his loss brain due to being the first United States victim of Foot & Mouth disease.