From: Gary S.
Gevisser [
Sent:
To: 'Dear JetBlue'
Cc: rest
Subject: RE: Your Message to
JetBlue - Speak up – stand up, 4 your rights¡¦
Dear Lynna,
Nothing and everything bothers me right now having just got
back from a long walk in Crest Canyon in Del Mar with our too dogs who are now
sound asleep. It is now going on 6:00PM PST and as tired as I am I feel the
need tu address your ignorance altho u mite respond somewhat better if I simply
let u know how much I detest those who ignore,
the essence of my complaint.
I am copying a number of folks on this email including the
co-executors of my estate, Mr.
In addition I am also copying a buddy of mine, Matthew Margo,
who like Mr. Krinsk is an attorney but unlike SCALs [Shareholder Class Action
Litigators] Mr. Margo doesn¡¯t quite have the same degree of ¡°skin in the game¡±
each and every day he shows up 4 work at CBS¡¯ 60 Minutes.
Matthew Margo tho,
does cum from very good stock, his father having built the ¡°blueprint¡± for the
Israeli Air Force right after Israel¡¯s War of Independence back in 1948 and my
hope is that Matthew will not find himself ¡°conflicted out¡± by simply joining
my wife and I 4 dinner one evening on this very special trip.
U may have gathered Polie is one of those left wing
¡°poop-head-talking heads¡± u so often see on those TV talk shows that annoy me
¡°tu know end¡± [non-sic].
As I write this email his ¡°best pal¡± from college, Mr.
And of course I always include FBI Agent Marc Culp et al as
well as Mr. George G. Hurst Esq. in most of my emails. Mr. Hurst remains the
attorney 4 Dr. JBS who now has too failed marriages under his belt and in a
matter of months, weeks, days perhaps even hours, as soon as my attorney Mr. James C.
Ashworth Esq. leaves hospital or is replaced by someone with equal skill &
experience altho hopefully less stressed, will be in receipt of one of the most
carefully thought through complaints ever filed against a single human being
since we first started recording time.
U m
My email consisted of 42 words and it
began with "We had no idea when booking the flight that
we wouldn't be able to have our two seats together."
My English altho not perfect did in fact begin unlike the
first words in the Old Testament without a "proposition" [sic].
So, one more time please address why u have the general
public first committing themselves to purchase a ticket, spending a
considerable time on the World Wide Wait, not everyone has a T1 connection
available 24/7=3.428571, before
having them pick
their seat assignments when in fact they may have little tu pick from?
Choice tu me is making a decision whether or not tu go
around in circles beating the bush
forgetting
the basics of the most pure language of all, mathematics, that tells us in a
precise manner that there is no such thing as a perfectly round circle much
like calculating the area of a circle that has Pi, 22/7=3.1428571, repeating
itself every 7 decimal points as opposed tu those who enjoy chasing their
tails, paying an ¡°arm & a leg¡± at places like 7 11, 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week, 24/7only repeating itself every 6 decimal points.
Nothing quite like burning fossil fuels altho getting many
of these folks out of their houses stopping them short of becoming couch
potatoes not quite the same as this painting that almost has the ¡°4shortening¡± down,
pat, altho those who don¡¯t have TVs resort tu sex, both activities reducing the
poison gasses that come from human farts which is, as u may know, nothing more
than airborne, minute particles of feces.
U addressing this concern of mine could make all the
difference between whether my companion and I get off tu a good start on
our honeymoon as in ¡°5,6,7,8 who
do we appreciate¡± baring
in mind our incredible endless journey thru life now 9+ years in the making,
not in any way, shape or form ¡°blinded by love¡± not to be confused with the
blind covering that fell down early Sunday morning in our bedroom at around 2AM
PST that had me absolutely frozen given my deep dream.
My ¡°travel
companion¡± who tied the knot with me back on April 22nd was, however, up in
a flash,
conjugating words I have only heard while in a rugby scrum, while the rest of
the household including 2 dogs
"hunkered down"
perhaps believing this was the beginning of the end.
Less than 15 minutes later we heard another crashing sound which
prompted Marie Dion Gevisser who is the ¡°skeptic of skeptics¡± when it comes to
coincidences being anything more than coincidences tu comment, "What is
it, twice we heard a noise?"
And of course u know from your basic physics that the only
place we hear noise, as in sound, is within spaceship earth, that only in a
non-vacuum environment do we have the luxury of knowing that even if a limb of
a tree were tu fall tu the ground in a wooded forest uninhabited by a single
human being or even an animal 4 that matter, sound would be created, altho it
is more likely a continuation of sum other event like the wind blowing, the
sound waves traveling ¡°tu infinity & back¡±, volume all a function of our
limited as well as limitless sensitivities.
And believe it or not I know a thing or too about the
difficulty of washing my back and
the need to watch my Ps and Qs and should someone decide to fire off a shotgun
in the direction of my ¡°duck-like¡±
face, then if given enuf warning I should be able to duck; unfortunately,
fortunately my hearing is going.
As we get older, begin accumulating things allowing our
deficit needs tu get in the way of simply taking care of our basic needs and
then using our surpluses to assist others, as in teaching which is starting tu
get right up there with the ¡°love of G-d¡± we end up doing not only ourselves a
great disservice but all those in need of their basic requirements being
fulfilled.
The instant we begin losing touch with our innate
sensitivities it is just a question of time before things like "selective
memory" kick in.
Fortunately or unfortunately as the case may be there are
still sum folks like me on this planet who not only understand the mechanics of
how things actually work but would rather be dead than allow anyone whether it
be a JetBlue customer commitment crewmember or someone like my wife's former
husband Dr. JBS or the chairman-CEO of Revlon,
I haven¡¯t bothered asking Marie how she would spell the #2
and since she never reads my emails it shouldn¡¯t really matter whether or not I
place a ¡°sic¡± next tTOo the end of the prior sentence.
It was really a "toss up"
between choosing u folks, paying sumthing like $150 more 4 the too of us
roundtrip, having to drive "back & forth"
between Del Mar and John Wayne International Airport up in Irvine where we
could possibly encounter the ongoing after effects of Marie¡¯s former husband¡¯s
neighbor, Mr. King Golden Esq. who altho priding himself on never being
involved in an accident while under the influence of drugs & alcohol while
driving ¡°back & forth¡± between here and Los Angeles could tho have created
so much turbulence as he went from one lane to the next unaware of anyone let
alone the possibility of a plane coming in tu land that ultimately suffered a
disastrous fate from sumthing akin to wind-sheer.
U of course remember that one private jet that crashed in
the parking lot just east of Interstate 5 as it was coming intu land at John
Wayne International Airport?
And no doubt u have realized by clicking on to one or more
of the hyperlinks that I don¡¯t believe 4 a minute in luck, simply always doing
the right thing, including keeping my big nose clean, detesting those who
derive great satisfaction in exceeding the limits of their small authority,
i.e. evil doesn¡¯t come in the form of a pointed tail or pitched fork.
So without much further ado please get back tu me ASAP tu
let me know what
can be done about the first leg of the flight and please
understand the need 4 me to be next to my wife who has committed in front of
our Jonathan that she will edit the first draft of what I, 4 1, believe will be
a bestseller, agree?
While writing this email I am also working on several other
emails including a reply
posting to Professor Aaron ¡°BrownNose¡± Brown a
co-founder of eraider.com website that looks like it mite exceed 6,000 words.
I am ¡°under
the gun¡± right now to complete my book M
At one point I had hoped that Marie would allow me tu bring
our dog Puppytoe along
who I thout would help in the sale of the book just like he was the center of attraction
at our first franchisee¡¯s showing of GrubbyGrub and GirlieGarb.com.¡¡
Mari¡¯s response was sumthing to the effect, ¡°If the book
can¡¯t stand up on its own then forget about it being a bestseller, knucklehead,
Lord of the Flies¡± [sic] thinking possibly to herself at the time about our
fighter-friend
U may have heard tho that the son of Marie¡¯s artist-painter
teacher, Sebastian
Capella, can do a whole lot more than play the piano brilliantly altho I
have yet tu hear this rather talented individual, in many ways very similar to
Now if I continue in this vein it is very likely Marie when
I next see her possibly later this evening 4 dinner at our rock cabin mountain
retreat might decide to drop a ball on my head and G-d
only knows what that will do tu my libido tu mention just in passing my
recently being ¡°fixed¡±,
i.e. I cannot afford to lose my bearings let alone forget how important it is
tu maintain a sense of humor in the worst of times, which I think is probably
the only reason why the Jewish people have survived so long.
Certainly, it has nothing to do with them being better
lovers, and of course us being constantly under stress it is simply
inconceivable that we would produce healthier sperm let alone our better halves
being able tu cultivate fertile eggs, altho we possibly could still ¡°make out¡± if the world
continued producing wimps, i.e. we could sell our abundance of testosterone and
there are of course exceptions to this rule best illustrated in my close
attorney-colleague Mr. Jeffrey
Krinsk Esq. who was caught on camera applying sum of Revlon¡¯s Love that Pink lipstick to the nose of my dog.
Now tu be clear on this use of the word ¡°knucklehead¡± it is
unlikely my wife who like Chagall doesn¡¯t always paint bright, is tho, very
precise and very much Jewish in her Roman Catholic upbringing, would have used
such a word. In fact I have now just 4 the second time this past Sunday morning
heard her use the ¡°F¡± word at first blaming my ¡°poor¡± dog who was crunched up,
shaking under the duvet.
Please let me know how many copies of MMI I could count on u
purchasing 4 family members, friends, acquaintances, dog lovers, never tu
forget all the goodies we will eventually be offering on EmanANDdog.com¡êmoc.GODdnaNAME
and please let me know whether u would like to hear more about GrubbyGrub and
GirlieGarb.com which is geared toward putting folks back to work without it
costing an ¡°arm &
a leg¡±.
¡¡
Thank you,
Gary S. Gevisser
Aka The Pisser
[Word count 2488]
-----Original Message-----
From: Dear JetBlue [mailto:DearJetBlue@jetblue.com]
Sent:
To: gsg@sellnext.com
Subject: Your Message to JetBlue
To:
Re: e-mail received Saturday,
Hello Gary,
Thank you for your e-mail.¡¡ Your outbound flight is so full that the
only seats remaining are the ones that will be assigned at the airport
upon check-in.¡¡ We are required to reserve these seats for priority
needs such as disabled customers.¡¡
If we have customers on the flight with priority needs, the boarding
agent will assign them to these seats, and their seats will then be
released for re-assignment to other customers.¡¡ If there is no one on
board with special needs, these seats will be available by request.
You may wish to arrive at the airport approximately 90 minutes early in
order to be near the front of the line.¡¡ Please ask our airport
crewmember for help with your seat reservations.
Have a great flight!
Hope all your skies are JetBlue!
Lynna
JetBlue Customer Commitment
Crewmember 21367
Original Message Follows:
------------------------
We had no idea when booking the flight that we wouldn't be able to have
our two seats together. Please get back to me asap to let me know what
can be done about the first leg of the flight.
¡¡
Thank you
¡¡
¡¡
-----Original Message-----
From:
[mailto:jetblue.4166402.2019.3934170@reply.jetblue.com]
Sent: Saturday, July 05, 2003 8:03 PM
To:
Subject: JetBlue Itinerary for 15 Jul 2003
¡¡
