From: Gary S.
Gevisser [gsg@sellnext.com]
Sent: Friday, May 09, 2003 3:07 PM
To: 'seansimic@hotmail.com'
Cc: (arf@mdrealtycorp.com); Shaim
(shaim@covetech.com); Devin Standard (Devin@quasark.com); gremeltech; Jeff
(jrk@class-action-law.com)
Subject: re: sale of 1431 Stanford
Street, Santa Monica, California
Sean hi, I got your phone message and I am sorry we got cut
off at such an important juncture the other day but I think the time that has
elapsed will do us both the world of good. Time though waits for no man.
I am copying Alan Friedman on this email as he was expecting
to hear back from me several days ago once I had communicated with all the
tenants.
As I mentioned I want to do all my communications with the
rest of the tenants by email and I only have the email address of Irma
in number 3 who last corresponded with me with back on April 8th of
last year and I have no idea if that email address is still good. I plan though
to respond to Irma in short order asking her among a couple of things which I
will probably cover in this email to give me the email address of Abner Weiss
who barmitzvahed me like most of the 13 year olds from my generation living in
Durban, South Africa.
It won’t take a rocket scientist who has been reading
my emails to know some if not all of the rather important questions I intend to
pose to this rather great man who was both outnumbered and outgunned while
trying to bring out the best in each of us in an incredibly pathetic environment
that had the “Cap-os”
making certain that neither he nor the Jewish Day School principals ever got
too far out of line, never to forget that I for one do not recall one single
placard
demonstrating even the slightest bit of despair felt by some of us
youngsters who did their best not to be co-opted let alone end up as dead
“to be used in a ‘practical’
for some university experiment.”
As you may know the Weiss’ and my family have been the
very best of friends going back to the year dot and of course you know how good
these people really are since you also use their maid, Delia who I would now
also like to have on my email list. And while you at it have Delia give me a
call.
I don’t want to keep Alan Friedman or his client
waiting indefinitely but equally important is my desire to sell the property in
order to do other things that don’t have me worrying about fukukta stuff
like utility bills, insurance and whathaveyou. You do a terrific job in
relieving me of a lot of stress but at the end of the day I am the one
responsible for making the most of what remains of what I believe has been a rather
productive life. I have held on to this property for sum 16+ years and God only
knows what I could have done with the proceeds had I sold it long before even
you became a tenant.
Every single tenant though who has ever been given the
opportunity to rent from me should be more than simply appreciative; no upfront
“key
money”, nowhere near to market rent, and every one I believe besides for
you came in after January 1996 when I would have been allowed to increase the
rents to market rates, increases few if ever, it has been at least two years
with most tenants if not three or more, never once invading their privacy
unless I was sleepwalking, allowing tenants “quiet enjoyment”,
never doing stuff like tenting the building and then having the tenants leave
for a day or two, then bringing in a furniture removal truck with the truck
driver pinning a note
on to each tenants front door to call the trucking company to let them know
which country they would like their earthly possessions dropped from a Boeing
747 while I send in someone like Guy Friedman who has
the backing of only God knows how many Chinese all over the world who in a
matter of “tTOotTOos”
[sic] would come in, make a few modifications, sell the unit-s for market
value, say to anyone who harbors a grievance, “sue Gary if you can find
him”, never once though have I ever sued a tenant let alone one single
human being, although when I do eventually file a lawsuit-s against my
wife’s former husband et al some might argue I might still be able to say
that I have yet to sue a single “human being”, always taking care
of repairs, never bringing up stuff like ‘my dad has pig heart’ and
needs a break from touring the world playing “gold”
[sic] up the kazoo, never going so low as to suggest that my insight I have
provided over these God knows how many years should be seen as each of you
having to make a “silk’s purse out of a sow’s
ear” and whathaveyou is a rather decent landlord even to idiots who see
the garbage disposal as a way to rinse out their hair who sometimes leave
without paying the utilities.
And so I am going to appreciate the tenants responding with
the same level of integrity and good faith that I have exhibited during their
stay in what has been a rather special “safe
haven”, not to forget after reading all this that I must have the dates
by which each tenant agrees to move post haste.
Now if I get run over by a truck or even by Sammy Haim
in his top of the line Mercedes who doesn’t know how to back up let alone
park, stocks to boot, just forward this email on to each tenant and then I will
let them deal with Devin Standard and Jeffrey Krinsk executors of my estate. I
added Jeffrey assuming there is an insurance company that will be willing to
bear the risk of anyone being an executor of my estate.
Now if old toppy Sammy is thinking that somehow I may have
been responsible for the scratching
noise I heard at 7 this morning and decides to sue me perhaps word go up the
line all the way to say Hank Greenberg, CEO of Chairman of AIG who may decide
not to provide insurance coverage to anyone including the executors of my estate figuring that simply by
association they must be incredibly dumb as me to continue staying in a spot,
typing away on a fukukta computer when all Sammy would need to do to get rid of
me is to get hold of some cyanide gas, pump it into the heating system, leave
for a minute or two and I come back and find me crazy as a dog.
Even though my dog has bad breath on occasion especially
after I have let him eat away at a deer or two I have found dead along the road
although it could simply have been two cows, in the event I were to get a sniff
of something stinky I
would first hold my breath as long as possible and in a worse case scenario
sacrifice the dog by sucking all the air out of his lungs.
Just ask Marie about the deep breaths this dog takes. You
may have read in one of my previous emails this past week that I found Pypeetoe
when I woke up in the morning with his head on Marie’s pillow and his
nose almost touching hers. She was out cold. Now you have to understand that
the rest of his body was stretched all across the room. I suspect though that
Pypeetoe in figuring us all out has decided that in the event a weapon of mass
destruction reaches our neighborhood that before licking his chops goodbye, and
believe me he has been practicing a lot lately, he plans to first take the
deepest breath of oxygen generated by the sweetest smelling breath in the
world.
I haven’t heard from Jeffrey Krinsk directly since we
had lunch the day before yesterday. I am assuming he is on his way back from
I am though expecting another rather important package from
his office and there is always the possibility that Devin Standard might be out
there on his own protecting what remains of my estate if say one of
Jeffrey’s colleagues such as Bob Kaplan gets pissed off enough with me
and decides to lob off Jeffrey’s head as a way to strike back at me but I
figure that Devin would be able to bring in reinforcements.
Now, if however, Bill Lerach of Milberg
Weiss decided to really join forces with his even uglier partner in New
York and hire say a Mafia hit man to knock on Jeffrey’s door with my dog’s head all
spiced up, then I would be compelled to respond with a knuckleball of my own
which in all likelihood would be a run of t-shirts having
Melvyn Weiss’ and Bill Lerach’s face plastered on the front and
back. Most importantly I think I would have enough clout to talk Marie in to
giving Campbell Soup 5% of the proceeds from the sale of such items bearing in
mind that at least 10% of GirlieGarb.com etc’s profits are already
earmarked for charity but when you consider we would be able to get people like
Professor “BrownNose” Brown to make himself useful and stand on a
corner waving his hands, nodding back and forth, his beard flapping in the
wind, the number of sales we might generate could be sufficient to have
President Bush decide to stop the currency printing presses and rethink our
entire economic structure, first though he is going to have to do the very smart
thing and suspend trading of public companies.
I figured on Jeffrey being a co-executor with Devin who is
about to join another fukukta conglomerate since in the event that Jeffrey
decides to take my advice hang up his gloves, burn his law school diplomas,
that allowed him to be one of the very best shareholder class action attorneys
on the planet, there is still a mortgage or tTOo to pay each month and the fees
he can earn as executor of my estate could very likely prevent his wife,
Campbell Soup, having to go out and peddle the koi and piranha fish that I
assume are still frolicking in his 180,000 gallon swimming pool.
It is my hope that once Jeffrey has finished putting in the
new wooden floors to the former mayor of San Diego’s home which could
very possibly extend now an acre or so into his front neighbor’s property
as a result of circumstances I don’t think I am allowed yet to talk
about, you will come down here for a bash that Jeffrey plans
to do in our honor and I assume he will inform Campbell Soup well ahead of
time.
Now don’t expect a big crowd nor for that matter
should you pull out your tuxedo and of course I remember that the tuxedo
I wore on my wedding was bought from you some 20 odd years ago. It is I must
say in rather remarkable good shape and believe it or not fits me better today
than ever before.
I am assuming there is at least one “x” in the
previous hyperlink showing our wedding and reception photograph. Now if I were
to consider the lost opportunity cost of that fukukta tuxedo and impute just a
nominal 50% internal rate of return considerably less than my average in the
years I lived in fukukta unit #4 God only knows how much sooner I would have
been in a position to take on the likes of Warren “BO”
Buffet.
Not everyone may agree with me on all issues but at the end
of the day I am comforted by how I believe God will judge me and he alone is 1,
period
Suffice to say at this time that I cannot do anything
without first having an opportunity to make my case to the remaining tenants.
There is no need to get an email address for folk-s in unit number 4 as I will
communicate directly with their corporate offices.
You and I will speak once I have heard back from the other 3
tenants, in units two, three and five.
Thanks
Ps – I am right now in race against the clock. Not
only do I have less than hour left of my 3 hour work day in front of the
computer typing I am also due back at Marie’s place to assist with
tonight’s work shop. I still have 3 more emails to get out, one to a lady
who handles “foster
care”, one to an insurance broker about the Stanford property and the
other to Jeffrey Krinsk which I have all but thought through.
