From: pacbell [gevisser@pacbell.net]

Sent: Thursday, August 08, 2002 8:35 PM

To: Patti. Smith

Subject: "Call to arms, p-h-d-leadING with our writes" [sic] = FOLLOW UP!

Patti hi - I wasn't sure whether the minister got my previous email that I sent out on July 17th titled, "Call to arms p-h-d-l-ead-ING with our writes" [sic]. So not long ago I coined the term "non-sic" to denote that there is no error contained "withINg" the expression in quotes as in, "Verbal [non sic] remedies for saving the word” [sic].

Sum folks think my goals are a little over the top in terms of trying to solve the problems of the world butt I think someone has got to at least try a different approach. Back "h-at-ome" [sic] we were taught expressions like, "Sticks and stones break bones but words will never harm me" when in fact as we grow up it is the words that often do the most damage, words kill. My goal is simply to help empower the kids to parent the parents who need the most guidance. Obviously something is wrong with the way previous generations have gone about parenting the young.

Please make sure the minister knows that I not only come in peace but without "crazy David" being my "ball breaker" nor pallbearer for that matter. I plan to be buried at sea, assuming I don't get swept out with the currents, “poissons et al” [sic]. "Crazy David" means well "butt he suntimes has a problem in executing" [sic]. I have though as the executor of my estate a gentleman by the name of Devin Standard. You will have to take my word for it that despite his picture not coming up on the website he is a good-looking man with brains to boot. He also likes speed and I have never asked him whether he smoked Durban Poison. Having spent as much time in Europe especially in Holland it is possible he came across one of South Africa's great exports during the late sixties and seventies. I have no idea what has happened since I left the country in 1978, certainly though if that trade had continued along the same path the minister would have stayed at Trade and Industry and not be worried right now about having to travel to places like Singapore to help balance the budget.

I don't want to have to repeat what I previously sent the minister so please let me know whether he received my first email. By the way Devin's wife and "outlaws" [sic] are from Denmark but she is very cool. Actually, I doubt very much that his in-laws would have it within their nature to do anything outside of the law.

One of the so-called cool expressions these days here in the States and perhaps it is the same in South Africa is the word "fat" spelled "phat." I just got back after spending the afternoon at the beach where I got in some body surfing with my "god" [sic] Pypeetoe. By the way the pitching wedge you see laying next to the dog was manufactured in South Africa in the late 1980s, the head being produced by Armscor. The story behind how I got this golf club on board a plane at Los Angeles International Airport stopping over in Houston at George W. Bush International Airport without the dog or the golf club being checked once and then going on to Peru where I traveled back and forth by planes and trains will all be told in a book I am writing called Manager Minute One, a takeoff of a 1980s business book best seller, One Minute Manager.

I like to look at things differently, approaching problem solving in a somewhat unorthodox manner including looking at things from right to left. I am also in the process of launching a series of websites aimed at empowering the youth. One of those websites is EmanANDdog.com which is a takeoff on the stock trading website eTrade.com. Spelled backwards it reads MOC.GodDNAname so what do you think? Could I be more crazy than "Crazy David"?

There is though a very serious side to what I am doing and that is what I wish to convey to the Minister. Again, please let me know whether he received my previous email which included I believe a reference to the email I sent the folks at the Fox Network titled Epilogue... For one thing I don't want to repeat the unfortunate Gip-sy story involving this pig farming family from Denmark. Talking of bloody mess, I nearly got run over earlier this evening by a "serf dude" [sic] doing an illegal U turn. His pickup had a sticker that read something along the lines of, "Save whales, harpoon a fat chick." I was thinking this guy would possibly get better luck if he changed his sticker to read "Save sperm, harpoon a phat whale" [sic] [i.e. Save Mr. EPS, no-oprah a phat whale Or simply PUT, Save guys your Earnings Per Share; no Opera, no Win, no Free lunch for phat “persons” who wear lots of hats, whales and swordfish to boot to freedom. FYI “Poussin” is French for “chick” and of course he-she without sin should be the first to throw rocks better yet someone who has good balance.]

Patti you will see that once I get going I do a pretty good job of helping folks who are half way competent in separating the wheat from the chaff. All that is required is that they be intellectually honest.

Alles van die beste,

Gary